Did you know that male birds are more beautiful than female birds? While not all are, some are bigger, brighter, flashier, and more flamboyant. Take the Peacock as an example. The male peacock’s feathers are mixed with a flashy royal blue combined with a dash of green and a smidge of yellow. Then they bellow out a beautiful mating call to attract any female in the area, and once their eyes meet, it’s time for the peacock to spread its back feathers and show off.
The Rhino-Beetle, on the other hand, does not look flashy, but the bigger and stronger they are, the more likely their chances of mating with the female would be. How the male Rhino-Beetle attracts females is that they climb up the branch towards the female, and to win her attention, he must face all the male beetles who have the same idea of mating with the female; engaging themselves in a battle of strength and size to see who can flip who off the branch.
It’s amazing how nature has its way of attracting a female mate in the wild. Funny enough, we humans do not stray far from the methods used by the animal kingdom. Men and women dress their best, groom themselves to look attractive, and work out to look muscular or leaner. We also think it’s funny how we, humans, wear perfume just like ants and termites spraying off pheromones to attract the workers to mate with the queen.
That’s enough human-to-animal comparison. You’re here to learn how to be more attractive to the women you want to date. A lot of it boils down to what cards you are being dealt to play with. So, at the end of the day, what we say here wouldn’t matter unless you apply it.
The Kinds of Attraction
There are different ways of attracting people. It’s no secret that men have a different perception of what attracts women to them, and sometimes, it’s totally different from what women actually want. Here are the 4 basic kinds of attraction you will need to master before you can utilize them:
Aesthetic Attraction: Patterns, Colors, and Fashion
Remember what we said about birds being more flamboyant? To attract a woman, you will need to adapt this method. We’re not saying you should put on different-colored clothes and be the brightest-looking person in the mall—what you need is aesthetics.
Aesthetics are what people notice first. They’ll first observe your clothes, what kind of shoes you’re wearing, and what patterns you have on your shirt. The first impression comes with how you present yourself; that’s why you need to ensure your aesthetic attraction is strong.
What screams “you” and your aura? Would you look good in modern street clothes? Do you look snazzy in Old Money fashion? Or what about Yacht Style? These are some examples of fashion aesthetics men will go for.
When you go out on a date, please wear appropriate attire. These days, a lot of men would wear jorts, hockey jerseys, and a pair of sandals to go on dates—you’re not heading to Home Depot, you’re going on a date with a beautiful woman.
Body Language Attraction: Manners, Behavior, and Action
Some women don’t care for visual aesthetics, but how men behave or engage in conversations. Body language, behavior, and presence are some of the few non-aesthetic ways to attract someone.
What good would it be to dress up nicely but act like you’re not interested in dating a woman? Your actions speak louder than words. Hence, you need to make sure your body language attraction skills are in check.
If you want someone to be more comfortable with you, adjust your posture and hand movements, and remember to look them in the eye from time to time. One body language tip you need to get in your head is to make sure you’re not subconsciously going for your phone during the date. That’s a big turn-off.
Nonverbal cues and identifying mannerisms help you gauge whether you should be friendlier, more flirty, a little more serious, or funnier—whatever it takes to make your date feel comfortable with you.
Body language never lies. People can tell you’re faking your persona. You can tell if a person is feeling you or if they don’t like you. They’re able to tell whether you’re dominant and authoritative, soft-natured, mild-mannered, timid, wild, or even spontaneous. Just like aesthetic attraction, how you present yourself matters, only this time, it’s your movement and gesture.
Romantic Attraction: Passion, Desire, Fantasy
What is romantic attraction? Is it giving your date roses and chocolates? Is it wearing your best perfume on a date? Or is it dressing up like a Spanish soap opera hunk wearing a loose frilly white blouse and tight black pants with long blonde hair flowing in the wind? Not really.
Everyone loves a good romance, and love is such a funny thing. People love to fantasize about what their lives would be like if they were filled with love. This is where romantic attraction comes into play. You can tell them about your fantasies of going on romantic dates, you’re looking for someone to spend your life and your time with, yearning to love and to grow mature together.
Usually, these would come into action when you’re already on a date with someone. Avoid putting your romantic desires or fantasies on your information sheet in your dating app profile; just tell the world that you are a romantic man searching for that one woman to make her feel like she’s the only woman in the world (now that’s a play on fantasy and pop culture).
The caveat with romantic attraction is that you need to love the idea of it as well; you can’t go telling people fantasies of going on dates and cuddling each other on a hammock if you don’t even want those.
Sensual Attraction: Empathy, Emotion, Psyche
Some people would get the wrong idea of sensual attraction. They’d think it’s sexual, but it’s not. Sensual attraction is how you use your sensitivity to attract people to show them that you have a vulnerable side. There’s a sense of love, vulnerability, and genuine feelings when you show people that you’re not afraid to show emotions.
When having conversations with someone, showing that you’re actively listening to them would give them the impression that you’re an empathetic person—someone who can understand their feelings without judging them.
Attraction Differs From Person to Person
Here’s a little taste of reality: no one’s going to be attracted to all four things we talked about. Everyone has different tastes, different backgrounds, different views in life, and different outlooks.
Sure, some of them would love the idea of romance, but they may not be into being vulnerable. Some people wouldn’t even care about how a person looks, but would base their attraction levels on how they brought themselves up and managed their career. Some people are superficial and are into aesthetic attraction more than being attracted sensually. But that’s the reality of people’s preferences.
Play Your Cards Right
We know that you might not master every attraction we talked about, but if you understand how it works, it will flow naturally. But all these things would be for naught if you don’t have CONFIDENCE.
How to be more attractive has a lot to do with how you carry yourself. Confidence is the best perfume to use. Confidence is the best suit you’ll wear. Do what you do with pride. But don’t mistake arrogance for confidence; there’s a huge misconception about it.
Not everyone is dealt good cards to play with. Should that matter? No. You want to show the world that you’re not afraid to be yourself, showing what you’re made of and what style you’re using. Nothing is sexier than a confident man.